thinking of him!!

If only a few days, my mind keep thinking of him. My mind is the one who asked me to leave him, and now my mind keep thinking of him. Every morning when i wake up, is so hard for me. I have to tell myself he is not with me any more. But have a habit, every morning i wake up i will think that he is still with me, and i will be very happy and wanting to contact him and msg sweet msg to him.
We both like to eat korean food, we both like cheezes cake. All the memories just keep flashing every moment of us together. Bangkok, with him. Before he went cambodia. I know i am make him very disappointed with me during the day he was at cambodia. After when he came back, i am the one who make things worst. I hate myself why not to be understanding and why not to be patient and demanding.
My room, i ever told him before too. My room is printed by lots of different colour before by different ppl. And these time round i want him to print with me, becoz i though he will be my last. He gave me a wonderful room. A room that belong to me and him. But right now is a room that make me very sad that i still have to stay with it.
The colour that i never think of it, we chose the colour. He gave his idea.
The mirror, fix it my his hand. No matter how much i said and how much i think back is all gone. I am so mentally tired these few mths. I can't concertate on my other work. I fail my assisgment. I have not mood to do.. My first assisgment which he help me alots. Which he help me to find for places to print the assisgment. We run there and here we called every where asking for printer.
He really did alots for me, for the frist three mths. I think i fail to apprecate him and give in to him during the time. And i still wanting more from him. I fail to understand him, how tired he is from work. How stress he is after work. But everything was just too late. He will never give us another chance and he will never. Will we be together again? If we are back together can we forget everything bad in the past? Why to become a human? Why do i have to grown up? I still love him.